How To Be Spooky & Sweet

If you are anything like me you live your life somewhere between the extreme darkness and extreme light.  It’s a wonderful and expansive grey area that most people can find themselves within. Full of horror movies and cupcakes, bats and butterflies.  Below is a step by step list on how to live in the spooky and sweet space.

Step 1) Know Yourself

This sounds easier than it is.  It is imparative that you be honest with yourself about who you are and what you enjoy.  Life is full of pressure from outside forces that tell you what to like and what not to like.  Only you know for certain what your preferences are.  If you love eggs benedict, but hate getting up before 5pm, that’s just who you are.  Maybe you are meant to run a bar that serves midnight brunch.  (which I might have to start…) If you find yourself dreading certain activities that you tell yourself you are supposed to like then you probably really aren’t into those activities.  Be honest with yourself about how you really feel.

Step 2) Own Who You Are

If you only eat sushi for dinner then buy stock in sushi rice and own it.  Don’t make excuses or try to change.  For most of my life people have told me I need to wear more color.  I have wasted hundreds of dollars on clothes I never wore because I tried to be someone I’m not.  Now I won’t buy something if I know for certain I won’t wear it.  On the other hand, if I see something that is outside my usual choices that I love I buy the item.  It’s about being yourself without apologizing or allowing other people to define you.

Step 3) Don’t Bother With Labels (Unless You Really Like Them)

I subscribed to the label of Goth when I was in high school and a few years afterwards.  I allowed my definition of that label define me for many years.  I would make decisions based on what I thought being Goth meant and what I could or couldn’t due because I was Goth.  One of the best things I could have done for myself was to ditch the label. I used to think that since I was Goth I had to behave a certain way and couldn’t like the same things “normal” people liked.  I was just plain wrong. Now I don’t force myself to wear all black clothes or tons of makeup because that’s just not who I am.  If you like to self identify as anything that’s great, as long as it makes you happy.  Just don’t allow labels to keep you from your true self.

Step 4) Understand That Normal is Relative

As Morticia Addams once said “what is normal for the spider is chaos for the fly”.  Honestly I think that says it all.

The bottom line in a nut shell is to be who you naturally are, and if that means you love skulls and bunnies or you cry at sad movies and laugh watching Saw, then that’s your “normal”.  The sweetest part of being spooky and sweet is being you.

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